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Amatus - beloved

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On a good day,
Amatus wanted to become happy.
And sat down.
Not just like that,
he really went for it.
But happiness did not come naturally.
Amatus got angry.

He chased it, that happiness.
And then found it once here,
then once there.
But always fleeting.
And over time
decreased the happiness effect.
Amatus needed more and more.
Longer and fiercer.

Yet happiness ebbed away
The desire does not;
restless his heart remained.
He saw a horizon
Who always remained in the distance,
no matter how hard he ran.
Amatus ran and hurried
but never arrived.

Yet Amatus sensed there had to be more.
Or did he just want to?
The latter went too far for Amatus.
Because then nothing was true or good or beautiful.
Only the mirror of one's own desires.
His soul caught the scent of freshly baked bread.
But Amatus found only fortune cookies.
Never filling, always tasting like more.

oeg Amatus happiness after in the world,
Then he chased it away.
Did Amatus seek happiness within himself,
he discovered no truth.
Did Amatus leave it at that,
there remained restless longing.

Until one day,
Amatus saw the light.
- literally -
He was hunting shadows all along,
Had dodged the light.
It took courage to see into the light,
For living in the shadows ruins the eyes.
And in that light, Amatus found
the source of shadow.
The ghost became spirit,
shadow reality.

Amatus could see
As he was seen.
Could love
As he was loved.
Found peace even though he had lost everything.
And luck found him.

In a previous blog I have described the search for wisdom, and more or less put away the search for happiness. Yet the search for happiness is not so crazy, there it soon becomes apparent that the "fulfillment of momentary desires" is not satisfying for most. Man always strives for the good life. But what ís good? So I have tried to capture the essence of this quest, and the intention of my previous blog, in this short story.


Erwin de Ruiter

"One man tries to express himself in books, another in boots; both are likely to fail." - G.K. Chesterton

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